Sacrificing the artist.
Sacrificing the Artist: A Reflection on Becoming an Art Educator
As a child I spent countless hours drawing and creating art, I would write my own stories and make small drawings to give away. My art has inherently always been about sharing it with others. As I became older I got to meet people who chose to teach others how to cultivate their artistic talents. This inspired me immensely and in a way I desired to be just like them. As I grew, art remained the lens through which I interpreted and saw the world. Each brushstroke, charcoal smudge, and paint stain on my clothing a whisper from my soul, a conversation between my inner self and the infinite possibilities of creativity. Yet, as I pursued a diploma in becoming a fine art educator, I found myself navigating an uneasy paradox: sacrificing the spontaneity and freedom of my inner artist to embrace the structure and discipline required to become a teacher. It did not feel like both things could exist in their complete glory at the same time.
The transformation is both humbling and demanding. Gone are the days when I could paint through the night, guided solely by inspiration and naivety. Now, my creativity is often channeled into lesson plans, critiques, and theoretical frameworks. The canvas of my dreams is now mostly dominated by the realities of pedagogy: curriculum standards, student engagement strategies, and educational philosophies. It’s a shift from self-expression to fostering the expression of others. This in itself is not bad. On the contrary, I do believe it to be a successful representation of what it means to become a good educator.
This sacrifice, however, is not without purpose. In surrendering a part of my artistic freedom, I am learning to see art not just as a solitary pursuit but as a collective experience. Teaching art is about more than imparting techniques; it is about igniting the creative spark in others, showing them that art can be a mirror, a voice, and a sanctuary. This realization has deepened my appreciation for the role of the educator, a guide who must often step back so others can step forward.
Still, the journey is not without its struggles. There are moments when I feel the pull of the artist in me, yearning for the unbridled freedom of creation. At times, the rigid structures of academic requirements feel like chains on my imagination. Yet, I remind myself that the sacrifice is temporary and transformative. By equipping myself with the tools of a fine art educator, I am not extinguishing my inner artist but refining it, merging my passion with purpose.
Ultimately, the decision to sacrifice the parts of me that are the artist is not about loss but growth. It is about evolving from an individual creator into a cultivator of creativity. The paintbrush may rest in my hand a little less often now, but the joy of seeing it picked up by others is its own masterpiece, a living, breathing art form shaped not by me alone but by the shared energy of teacher and student.
And so, I press on, believing that in teaching art, I will not only rediscover my inner artist but also inspire countless others to find theirs. In time, this role will change again, and by then, there will be different sacrifices I will have to offer so that I can move forward.